oh god the rape fog is back!
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
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