spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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