i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Randomize
