Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Randomize
