i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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