I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
