"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
i came on her dog
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
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