Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(814): View more from Pennsylvania

I wasted some perfectly good semen on her

Fav 17 1256 5356
share tweet
(250): View more from British Columbia

Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...

Fav 8 3623 1496
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(918): View more from Oklahoma

The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.

Fav 16 3673 1401
share tweet
(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....

Fav 18 1087 2889
share tweet
25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
Read it at the TFLN blog
(609): View more from New Jersey

Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?

(1-609): View more from New Jersey

In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions

Fav 2 2147 825
share tweet
(904): View more from Florida

The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.

Fav 12 1591 806
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(573): View more from Missouri

Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.

Fav 4 852 1631
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(402): View more from Nebraska

It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."

Fav 8 968 600
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(+61): View more from Australia

I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...

Fav 0 41 17
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT