Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there. http://tfl.nu/5ny0
  Replies (17) Good night (779) Bad night (3270)
• Favorite

  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (780): I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked." http://tfl.nu/ikiz
  Replies (37) Good night (4855) Bad night (613)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (315): We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same http://tfl.nu/yvn7
  Replies (26) Good night (7917) Bad night (852)
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (843): I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter. http://tfl.nu/3aqn
  Replies (6) Good night (2731) Bad night (874)
• Favorite

  (432): View more from Texas

  the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (432): the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel http://tfl.nu/t4be
  Replies (18) Good night (3465) Bad night (1264)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating http://tfl.nu/fvws
  Replies (10) Good night (3353) Bad night (943)
• Favorite

  (556): View more from

  Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (556): Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard http://tfl.nu/2l07
  Replies (10) Good night (2064) Bad night (690)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party http://tfl.nu/m7il
  Replies (4) Good night (2003) Bad night (667)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number? http://tfl.nu/y363
  Replies (14) Good night (1288) Bad night (560)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (315): Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room? http://tfl.nu/jfto
  Replies (10) Good night (1640) Bad night (514)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  You okay?

  (1-412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): You okay? (1-412): I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread http://tfl.nu/1951
  Replies (3) Good night (991) Bad night (515)
• Favorite

  (334): View more from Alabama

  We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (334): We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!" http://tfl.nu/8nad
  Replies (4) Good night (1538) Bad night (551)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (302): This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas. http://tfl.nu/72c6
  Replies (3) Good night (848) Bad night (316)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (484): I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone http://tfl.nu/t0ck
  Replies (1) Good night (325) Bad night (518)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night. http://tfl.nu/g1sg
  Replies (2) Good night (337) Bad night (209)

Randomize