Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(586): View more from Michigan

I'm not a real person

(586): View more from Michigan

I'm sorry, everyone knows that

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(425): View more from Washington

Hi

(805): View more from California

Babe...You're really smothering me right now

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(253): View more from Washington

Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab

(253): View more from Washington

I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.

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(870): View more from Arkansas

These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.

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Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
Read it at the TFLN blog
(402): View more from Nebraska

Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.

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(251): View more from Alabama

you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account

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(512): View more from Texas

Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?

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(905): View more from Ontario

This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!

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