I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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