I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
