i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Randomize
