I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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