Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
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