no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
