cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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