Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
