His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
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