I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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