i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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