I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
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