you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Such a big mess for such a small penis
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
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