Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Girls should come with a carfax report
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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