Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
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