recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Randomize
