In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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