I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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