it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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