happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
