You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
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