dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize
