do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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