I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
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