He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
I think my moral compass just broke
Randomize