And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
