I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Randomize
