I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
