Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
