You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cat food counts as protein by the way
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
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