Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize