don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
