WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize