Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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