I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
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I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
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His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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