Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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