Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
