im gay
i know
yea but for you.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Watching her eat just hurts me
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
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