Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
