she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
