I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
No more Irish car bombs ever.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
my god I love twenty year old dicks
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
