This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
