i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
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