How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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